A Year's Worth of Thoughts

Today is the year mark of moving out of our home in Ventura and following God's calling on our family to Atascadero. So much has happened in a year. There's no way I could have predicted then what our life would look like now. And I have seen God's hand through all of it.

It was a hard year. I am not a big fan of change, so leaving the comforts of a home that we poured so much of ourselves into and leaving friends and family and our church was against my nature. Not to mention watching my daughter experience loss as well. I think part of our human nature is to look and strive for comfort, and this last year was the opposite.

When we first moved, this is where the dog spent most of his time, under the kitchen table.

But it seems that it's always in those hard places where we learn the most about God. I wanted the comfort of familiarity, but God was teaching me that He is to be my place of comfort no matter where I am or what my circumstances are. A year ago I could not see what our life would look like now. We had only just found out where we were going to be living a few days before moving! But God knew, and I can say with confidence that His words to Joshua, "I will never leave you nor forsake you," (Joshua 1:5) have been true for us.

That's not to say that I am always at peace and never have moments of doubt or worry. It's a lesson I have to be reminded of. Just as our time of waiting for Caleb was a lesson in learning to trust God and surrender my plans to Him, it's been the same for this season but in a bigger way. But the result of being obedient to whatever it is God is calling you to is far better than anything you can imagine. And while it can be easy to write those words, it's challenging to live out, even when I've seen the fruit from the past of  God's faithfulness in those trusting moments. My default is comfort, and we are not always called to a life of comfort, but to rest in the Comforter.

So, time for a family update. Hannah started second grade at the end of August. We're excited to have a full year at Trivium. She loves going to class, but also says she enjoys her home school days as well. And I have to admit I am enjoying them more too. I read a very helpful book over the summer called The Well-Trained Mind and feel like I have a better grasp on this whole classical/home school thing.

Caleb started preschool this month two days a week and he is loving it. He has great teachers and comes home exhausted. He doesn't even want to eat lunch, he usually takes his nap first. 

Chris is keeping busy at Shoreline, and also getting ready for a hunting trip with his dad in Nevada. I'm keeping busy at home, keeping the children and animals alive. Somehow the days fly by. 

Lessons From a Messy Stove

I love a clean home. I love organization. The Container Store, Ikea, stores I look forward to browsing. I love having "a place for everything, and everything in it's place." But, life doesn't often work out that way. That is even more evident after having children.

I walked in to my kitchen the other day and the first thing I noticed was my messy stove. I really don't like a messy kitchen. To be honest, I don't really like messy anything. But as I looked at my messy stove and started to complain in my head, God reminded me of the benefits of the messy stove. Having a messy stove means I've been cooking. The remains of mac and cheese in the pot mean my children have been fed (it's summer, we eat mac and cheese often, don't judge). Remembering that my children have been fed means that God has provided food for us. 

I also love to cook and bake, and that usually requires making a mess before enjoying the finished product. So when I see a mess of flour and measuring cups on my counter, it's a reminder that I've had a chance to do something I enjoy. And I can be thankful for that. Those scones in the bottom left corner of the picture above, very messy to make, but oh so good to eat. 

Apricot jam is another messy endeavor. Well, maybe not for some, but it is for me! But it's worth the effort, because when it's done my family can enjoy it. And not only that, but I can also share it with others. Sometimes it takes messy work to invest in relationships, but it's so worth it.

Everyday life is messy. There are spills and crumbs and tiny scraps of paper left everywhere. Something God has been working on with me for almost the past eight years is the ability to let go of perfectionism. Not that my house has ever been perfectly, magazine picture clean and tidy. But realizing that relationships are more important than a clean house. Yes, I do still clean my house, but sometimes there are more important things. It may mean putting off cleaning up the kitchen in order to play a game with the kids or read them a book. I want my home to be a peaceful place, and if I am always stressed out about having a clean home and not making a mess, that will spill over on to my family.

So I'm learning to embrace the mess. To allow it to happen and offer grace. Because we can all use more of that.

Crossing a Finish Line

Well hello there! Goodness is this a busy time of year. Time to fill in the gaps for the last couple months. 

When we moved up here last fall, we started homeschooling full time and put Hannah on the wait list for a local Charter school call Trivium. It's very similar to the school she attended in Camarillo in that it's a hybrid program (three days homeschool, two days at school) and also a classical education format. Well, I got a call back in February that a spot opened up for her to attend the school! We were very excited and Hannah transitioned smoothly in to her new class. Also, we were able to keep using the same curriculum we started the school year with. 

This pic is from a field trip to San Simeon to see the elephant seals. We were able to join a wonderful local homeschool group and do lots of fun activities.

She just finished her last week of school, and it feels like a big finish line for me. I was so intimidated by full time homeschooling back in October. And let me tell you, it is no easy thing. It took took a lot of tweaking to figure out our daily schedule, and we finally settled on a routine that took advantage of Caleb's nap times. I feel like I have a better handle on it now, and I have certainly learned a lot along the way. I'm looking forward to second grade and continuing her schooling at Trivium.  

After basketball wrapped up, Hannah jumped right in to little league. She was the only girl on her team but didn't seem to mind. She had the same coach from basketball, and a couple of the same kids on her team too. She loved playing baseball, and says her favorite position is batter. And on defense her favorite is catcher or pitcher. 

Other happenings over the last few months: we moved again, but this time locally. The Lord gave us an opportunity to purchase a home. We closed escrow in December, and Chris spent three months fixing it up before we moved in. It's so awesome to see God's provision, and how he answered so many specific prayers we had for a home. One of the things we wanted the most was a friend nearby for Hannah. When we lived in our condo in Ventura, Hannah had a sweet friend in our complex just across the grass from us and they played together almost everyday. Friends are so important to her so we prayed for a friend nearby. Well, what did God provide? A six-year-old girl right next door. Hannah and Lydia play together almost everyday, and fortunately for them our fence has fallen down between our backyards so it's easy for them to get to each other. 

Chris is now full time at our church, Shoreline Calvary Chapel. He is also still making and selling Bronco Boxes. And, continuing to work on little house projects (there's always something!)

I was able to participate in another exam workshop for the California Architect's Board. It keeps me connected to the profession, and I get a couple days off of mom duty. I am praying about looking for some part time work in the fall when Caleb starts preschool. 

Speaking of Caleb, we celebrated his third birthday in May. My have three years gone by fast! He continues to live up to his name, wholehearted in everything he does. And, he talks non stop. We've decided he has no internal processing, he just verbalizes everything he's thinking. 

On a sad note, my grandmother passed away at the end of March. Chris and I went up to Oregon along with several relatives from the Mayes side of the family to see her laid to rest. It was a bittersweet time in that she is dearly missed, but sweet in that we got to spend time with a lot of family we don't see very often. And have a fabulous road trip to and from Oregon.

Cousins

Siblings, with a photobomb by the cousins

Last weekend had another road trip for me and the kids. We went up to Concord to spend some time with more family, my brother Jeff and SIL Lauren were out visiting from Indiana. The kids were able to play with all their cousins on my side and swim in Mimi and Papa's pool. I am so thankful to live closer to family and have the opportunity to make these trips. It means more miles on the car and spending a little more on gas, but it is so worth it. 

And, we got a cat. Meet Buster Posey (named by Hannah)

Other People's Thoughts

I've read several blogs over the last few months that have been very inspiring. So, I thought I would share them. You can click on the title of each one to read them.

Burn the Candles
This first post is by Shauna Niequist. I love the reminder to enjoy the blessings that come your way.

3 Helps: For When You Wish You Could Tame Your Tongue
Love this analogy for Proverbs 16:24. Sometimes I struggle with my words, especially with my kids. Such a good reminder to be filled with good things in order to pour out grace.

How Pursuing Your Gifts Impacts Your Kids
I like this reminder to pursue your talents and make time for things you enjoy. I think my top two would be baking and dancing. Unfortunately, one of those is rather expensive and I don't get to do it anymore, which makes keeping up with my baking rather dangerous. So I joined a gym to compensate. Not quite as much fun as dancing, but I get to exercise and watch HGTV at the same time. So it's not all that bad.
Becoming a mom did not make my other talents go away, they are still there. So I really liked the encouragement in this post to keep up with the talents God has given us and (hopefully) inspire our kids to search out their own God-given talents. I realize there are seasons in life, and sometimes we do have to put things on hold. Such is the case for my architecture career. And that's ok, because I know this season of raising my kids is where I am to be for now.

When Her Good News Makes You Feel Bad
 I struggled with this big time when trying to have baby #2 (Caleb) and it has begun to creep up again after over a year of trying for another baby. (You can read our story with Caleb here.) God's path for each of us is different, and nothing good comes out of comparing ours with someone else. I am praying for God to bring me back to a place of contentedness; that if His best plan for our family is for us to not have anymore kids, that I will be ok with that.

You Are Enough 
A short and sweet encouraging post by Shauna Niequist.

Out of the Fog

I have been lagging again with posting here, part of the reason being that all four of us have been sick in the last three weeks. It started with Chris, then went to Caleb, then I joined the party. And just as the three of us were on the mend, Hannah went down. So that's my excuse for the month of January but I have no defense for not posting in December - other than it's December and that always seems to be a busy month. But now that I am feeling better it's time to update.

So, here's a quick recap of our happenings.

Christmas. Being that this was the first year since having kids where Chris was not committed to working on Christmas Eve, and we now live closer to family, we went big. Between Christmas eve and dinner on Christmas day we managed to see all three sets of our parents, plus lots of extended family. It was wonderful to spend the time with so much family, some we haven't seen in a while, but I don't think we'll be making a habit of doing that much traveling in a 24-hour period.

The new year started uneventfully, we were all asleep. Hannah is in the middle of basketball season and just made her first basket in a game last week! Caleb, is just being Caleb; eating, talking, running, "fixing" things. He has also developed a habit of randomly screaming, which we are trying to curb.

Our highlight so far of the year was celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary on the 15th with a four day cruise! We haven't not been away from the kids for that long so I was nervous as to how they would do. But thanks to some wonderful, loving grandparents they did great and were completely spoiled. A cruise was the perfect vacation for us in this season of our lives: getting up when we wanted, taking naps, no cooking, cleaning or laundry. All good things. I read an entire book while on our cruise. Amazing.

We did a lot of this, sitting on a deck drinking coffee and reading.

On the tender to Catalina Island

We played mini golf instead of walking around Ensenada

Sunset in Ensenada

Another sunset from our room. We came home so refreshed.

Grace

Wow, I didn't realize I took such a long break from posting on here. I guess we've been busy.
This post is all about Hannah. We celebrated her 7th birthday in November. Where does the time go? I can't believe she is already 7!

How did she go from this...

To this...

 

 We celebrated her birthday with some friends in Ventura. Hannah was thrilled to spend some time with Ventura friends. We were too! It was such a fun day.

 

 

This girl...she has my heart. I love the way she laughs, just hearing it makes me laugh. She is kind and compassionate. She is adventurous. She loves her friends, and as I think I have said before, can make friends anywhere. The first time we went to a new park here in Atascadero, she made friends with two sisters, and we have since met them at the park again several times. This extroverted girl has been good for this introverted mama.
Grace is her middle name, and she has shown me grace so many times. Unmerited favor. So many times as a parent I have felt like I've failed or not given my kids the best. I can be short with them. I can yell. I can lose my patience. Why is it always so much easier to see our faults instead of our victories?
But then, this beautiful little girl leaves this note for me:

(Translation: I love you Mom so much. I love you every day. I am lucky to have you.)

And that just melts my heart. It makes me think maybe I'm doing a better job as her mama than I think. For all those times I fail, she still loves me and says she's lucky. And isn't this how God loves us? His love for us is not based on our works, not on what we do or don't do. It is unmerited favor. Getting what we don't deserve.

"For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast."

Ephesians 2:8,9

I think I'm the lucky one.

An Overdue Update

Hi! We're here, we're alive and well. I apologize for the silence on the blog, things have been a little chaotic over the last three weeks. It's going to take a few posts to cover everything. So, I'll go back to the move. 

This was no easy thing, let me tell you. For a few months we were looking to purchase a home since there weren't many rental options. In August and September we made several trips to Atascadero to look at different homes, and even put in four different offers but nothing worked out. Finally, it was too close to our moving date to keep trying for a purchase so we switched to rentals. Having a dog really limits your rental options. And since Chris will be building bronco boxes and possibly painting, we needed a garage to store equipment and have a space for him to work.

So, three days before we had to move out of our home in Ventura, Chris went up to Atascadero one more time and signed a lease on a house. It was really the only rental available that fit our needs. God had us wait until the eleventh hour to know where we would be moving, which was very hard for me. I am still growing and learning how to trust. We just had to keep going back to the last word we had from the Lord, which was to move to Atascadero.

We are so thankful for all the wonderful friends who helped us move, we couldn't have done it without you. It means a lot, especially knowing they didn't want us to move but came and helped anyway. Case in point: we had dinner with a few friends a week before the move and asked them to not be too sappy or sad, we just wanted to enjoy their company. They took it to heart and brought a very appropriate cake.

In case you can't read it, it says Just Leave Already

We had a week of transition between moving out of our home and moving in to the rental. So we hung out at the beach house in Cayucos with our packed U-haul. Not a bad place to be stuck for a few days. The second half of the week the kids and I went back to Ventura so Hannah could finish up the first session at Beacon Hill. We were so blessed to be a part of that school even for a short time. They really helped to get us set up for this season of homeschooling (more on that later).

Finally on Oct. 3 we moved in to our rental. It's a beautiful home and is a good fit for now. We had lots of family help us move in, as well as the pastor and some members of our new home church, Shoreline Calvary Chapel. The neighbors next door are Christians and attend Calvary Chapel Paso Robles. The biggest issue with the house is the lack of yard space. There is almost no yard for the kids to play in. So, we are very quickly learning where the parks are to get the kids outside and active.

Hannah has already made friends with the pastors daughter. She still misses her friends in Ventura very much.

Chris started in his position as part time worship pastor last week. He's enjoying it and everyone at the church has been very welcoming.

I will try to post more soon about our happenings and getting settled. If you have any questions don't hesitate to ask. Thank you to all those who have continued to pray for us. We couldn't have done this without your support!